So now we need pictures of corpses on a pack of smokes to save ourselves. Big brother reaches out a little farther each day. The late night comedians should get a whole weeks worth of material out of this silliness. Why stop there? Why not force the consumer to sign a waiver before they are allowed to buy cigarettes? Big, bold letters right at the top. Like this –

THE SURGEON GENERAL HAS DETERMINED THAT YOU WILL DIE A HORRIBLE DEATH IF YOU SMOKE THESE CIGARETTES

Should do the trick, right? The frigging lawyers run the world. We need warnings to not spill scalding hot coffee in our crotch. If someone does a stunt on tv, we need a warning to not attempt this at home, these are trained professionals. It feels like we are trained monkeys! You could really get nuts with this. Virtually every product could potentially be harmful in some way. In that spirit, I would like to contribute my own. Maybe it’s just my constitution, but I can’t eat Kentucky Fried Chicken unless I’m sitting on the crapper, because it’s going straight through. So this warning label should be on the front door of each location.

Advertisements

5 thoughts on “Warning label hysteria

Comments are now closed.