It’s a race to the bottom. Everyday we hear of a new level of invasiness. Big Sis seems to be attempting to up the stakes in response to the outrage. Now there are reports of the patdowns extending to inside your clothing.

The TSA has probably overtaken Al-Qaeda as public enemy number one. They promised they wouldn’t store the full body image scans, yet in a court proceeding they were forced to reveal that they indeed have. You can read that story here –

We must be running out of new lows the TSA can achieve soon. They have succeeded in taking full body nude pics of you and storing those pics for screeners to enjoy at their leisure. They have succeeded in advancing the back of the hand pat-down to a full-blown front of the hand genital massage. A cavity search would seem to be the next natural evolution of their procedures. Beyond that I can only imagine taking skin samples or possibly bone marrow transplants. Let’s all say it together. The TSA wants your DNA! The TSA wants your DNA! The TSA wants your DNA!

Impress your friends. Pick up one on these hot new t-shirts!

Since they’ve thrown down the gauntlet completely, maybe they could make some changes to alter the publics mood. I mean, if they’re taking an x-ray of us, how about making it useful? They could mix in a little cancer screening. Promote it for the women as a mammogram. They could even make a little money here. Give the passenger the option of purchasing the x-ray at the end of the line. Just have a high-speed printer hooked up and your image will be ready before you even have a chance to put your clothes back on and smoke your after sex cigarette. At the very least, since this is a cavity search, they could use the x-ray to check your molars for actual cavities.

How about this one. Almost no one enjoys the pat-downs. Why not spice it up? Let’s reverse the screeners. Males pat-down females and vica-versa. Hey, they’ve already got your nude pic, why not mix in some heavy petting? I’m quite sure the male portion of the population would welcome this change with open arms. As for you prudes out there, take the train.

Here’s another chance to make money. Have a vending machine handy with hot oil and lotion for your pre-flight massage. Let’s not forget that it’s our taxpayer dollars that are funding the TSA. What’s wrong with trying to raise a little revenue to offset the cost of the TSA? The country is broke, after all. They could even go so far as to offer the services of a shrink at the end of the screening process for those that feel they have been horribly violated and now have mental trauma. they would gladly shell out bucks for instant relief.

Seriously, did anyone ever envision that the TSA would degrade to such a state of perversion? In fact, they have an anniversary upcoming. It was November 19, 2001 when GWB signed the act into law creating the agency. Probably the worst we thought would happen back then was that they would be ineffective and still let bombers get on the planes. Well, as we’ve seen, they do that too. It’s hard to see how anyone can make a case for not returning screening to private companies and airlines the way it used to be. As a former screener myself, I can tell you for a fact that it was more effective when the old method actually used profiling to target potential threats and left grandma’s and babies alone. Many of the former screeners took up with the TSA and in talking with them, they informed me of the much higher percentage of ‘catches’ they had when tested. This can be verified today. The system worked better and we didn’t have to deal with the pathetic level of invasiness we do today.


2 thoughts on “TSA cavity search’s next?

  1. Yet Janet can’t tell us for certain that burka wearing women won’t be violated, err, checked the way everyone else has to be.

    Luckily I don’t fly. =(

  2. What’s ironic is the PC world we live in due to groups like the ACLU is finding the ACLU complaining about the screening process being unfair. They dictated that the TSA do this in the most inefficient way possible, by screening everybody the same.

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