Did you ever have one of those dreams where you wake up and can’t tell if you’re still dreaming? Not the really scary ones where you wake up naked in church or find out your mother-in-law is now living with you, but one where you just wake up to an average day you think is reality? Today was that day for me. Here were the headlines that befuddled me.

Saudi cleric tells students ‘Earth does not rotate’

Indian bride marries wedding guest after husband has epileptic seizure during ceremony

Officials Declare ‘Eating Healthy’ A Mental Disorder

Fort Lauderdale pays $65k for false arrest by police because ordering a slice of pizza is not a crime

Axelrod Claims The Obama Admin Hasn’t Had “A Major Scandal” Over Six Years

Terror suspect considered triggering volcano in U.S

An “A.S.S.H.O.L.E.” Will Be Everywhere, Promises President Obama

Twins Asking For 3somes

Police: Man in McChicken assault broke wife’s nose

That was it for me. I knew I needed to go back to sleep so I could wake up in ‘real’ reality. I mean, that is what I want, right? Reality must trump the make believe world the media wants me to live in. Right?